Sensitive readers, please stop here. Any reader who is not comfortable with a bit of slightly smutty chat, please come back to us next week when we shall endeavour to be more refined.

Now, this is done in the best possible taste by using a length of feather boa at fanny height, and pulling it suddenly up and out in a friendly salute.
Admittedly, yer average feather boa is not what one might call firm. So there are challenges in this move. But, oh my, the raucous one liners that we produced about the fact that some "cocks" were drooping; some launched themselves from waist level; and some failed to stand up on time at all, bursting into action too early or too late. The timing was inconsistent enough that we decided that I should just yell: "COCK!" at the appropriate moment as a cue.
Puerile, we know. But bloomin' funny.
Yes, we're sure that the professional showgirls don't do it this way. But who's having the better laugh, we ask?
Yours, prescribing laughter against the pressures of everyday life,
Burlicious x