15 Dec 2018

Knicker drift

It is a well-recognised fact that the pieces of clothing that make up a showgirl's outfit have a strong sense of mischief. We put it to you that this is something that the top professionals never have to overcome, cosseted as they are by their magical wardrobe mistress.

However, down here at the happy amateur end of the ladder, we have to dance, look scrumptious AND outwit bits of outfit that have started to express themselves.

  • The sole that departs from the shoe halfway through a routine
  • The corset that unzips suddenly, leaving its wearer in just a sparkly bra
  • The corset cups that suddenly launch breasts out of them, nipples winking confidently at the audience
  • Sequin tops that attach to fishnet tights when their wearer leans over... and that then remain attached, stubbornly
  • The slim heel that pops itself slyly in the loop of the other shoe's lace, forming an effective hobble.

Our last class was a chance to try out bits of outfit before next Wednesday's performance. Not making the cut were my knickers - reliable previously, but off like greased lightning down my thighs when coupled with this particular pair of tights (and repeated dragging them back up does not make for a good look). Also ditched are the Sparkly Bra Pixie's carousel corset, which spins round her torso at the first opportunity until it is back to front; a corset that prevents breathing; and some "up the bum" knickers.

Despite this, Showgirls, you and the routines are looking lovely. We're looking forward to strutting our stuff with you on Wednesday.

Yours, pondering the masking tape option,

Burlicious x

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